@StepfordWife,
Welcome. Hang in there!
You can't be DFed for not reporting hours.
You can't be DFed for whatever reason if there is only 1 witness (e.g. your husband) against you, and you an refuse to answer any question.
Please keep in mind that none of these people have any auhority , and they have no power over you. They cannot make you talk if you don't want to.
You can flatout refuses to talk to them or meet with them if you wish. You don't have to play the game by their rules.
You don't have to play their game at all.
These people have just as much authority over you as any stranger passing by in traffic: none.
In my case, my wife told the elders I am now an atheist. I politely refused their request to meet. There is nothing they can do until at least 1 other witness to my current beliefs comes forward.
Some friends and family sort of shun me anyway; unfortunately that's how they're wired to think and act.
Anyway, my main point is: you are in charge of you life. You don't owe anyone an explanation (except maybe your husband), and nobody holds any authority over you.
Best wishes!